A 30+ Year Old Dream Fulfilled! :)

Today was an incredible day for me!

I got to see a 30+ year old dream fulfilled and I am so very, very grateful!

First, of all, I got to spend the bulk of the day with this incredible group of people:

TSC Staff Christmas Extravaganza

As a part of our events together as a staff, we had the privilege of going shopping for a family that has some very real needs this year.  Multiple children, dad without a job, SCARY stuff!  I can relate, in many ways, to need.  From the time I was small, the Lord has seen fit to give me multiple opportunities to relate.  He has ALWAYS provided, ALWAYS!  But there have been many times over the years that He used others to do that.

If you have read all of my blog posts from the beginning or know me well you have heard this story.  To read the entire post, CLICK HERE

Here is the shortened version:

When I was seven years old, my Dad left a successful career in the Air Force to become a Missionary to secular college students here in the U.S.  He left a decent salary as a Captain in the Air Force for a known $100 a month and the hopes that other churches would join in their endeavors to increase that amount.  In the late winter after they joined the mission agency, when my mom was putting me to bed one night in the late winter/early spring, I announced to her that I wanted a pink flannel nightgown!

There were MULTIPLE problems with that request:  It was the end of the “flannel nightgown season”.  Mom knew I wouldn’t be wearing one much longer that year.  There was NO money to buy a nightgown or the material to make one.  AND I was right in the middle of a major growth spurt – by the time I was eight I was as tall as I am now…  Mom, without hinting to me about her skepticism, suggested that we pray about it as she put me to bed, said a short prayer, tucked me in and went about her business.

Fast-forward to the next day:  I went to school.  While I was there mom checked the mail.   That day in the mail there was a box from the sewing circle at Mom and Dad’s home church in Iowa.  I have absolutely no idea what else was in that box.  It was filled with several items, but at the very bottom of that box was my PINK FLANNEL NIGHTGOWN and it was big enough that I wore it for several years afterward!  (And just in case you missed this detail, that means it was made AND mailed before it was even an idea in my little mind!)

That was the first of my many reminders in life that God knows and has it covered!

Now, about today!

We were divided into teams as a staff and each team was assigned a child to shop for.  We had a time limit and were to be rewarded for getting back first.  (For the record, here was the reward, which BY THE WAY, my team WON HANDILY!!!  😉

Sweet ride for the first and second place teams. That’s me fourth from the left!

As we divided up as teams, our team assigned certain items to each team member to get them picked out and meet up with the other members to check out.  My assignment?

Flannel PJs for a six year old little girl!

My JOY???  I got to buy TWO pair.  She loves horses, and I was THRILLED to find one pair with a horse on it.  The other pair?  Guess what I found?  PINK PLAID!

I am still overwhelmed.  For many years, I have wanted to be able to “pay forward” the gift I was given.  There are many factors that have kept me from being able to do it up until today, but TODAY that changed and I am forever grateful!  My heart is full.  My prayer is that those soft, comfy little pieces of flannel will teach a little girl the same lesson that MY nightgown taught ME all of those years ago.

On nights like tonight, when I am waiting for the verdict from the repairman tomorrow on a MAJOR necessity in my home, my mind always goes back to that package as a reminder that before I even know I have a need, God has already taken care of it.

There is probably no greater lesson that we can learn in life and I count myself so very privileged to have learned it early.

I pray the same for her and her family.  God is good.  ALL of the time.

And I am grateful!!!

 

Her Price? Far above RUBIES! She was MY RUBY!

Two weeks ago yesterday I got a phone call that I have been dreading for a very long time.  My mom called to let me know that my Grandma, my Dad’s mom, whom I have loved dearly all of my life, went to be with Jesus.  It was not unexpected, as you will see below, but happened much more quickly than my immediate family thought possible.  She was tired.  She lived a good life, and she was ready to see Jesus.  We all believe that once she was finally truly ready to go, she was READY, which is why it didn’t take long.

On the Saturday night before she was promoted to Heaven, my Dad called.  That call prompted me to have a NEED to write.  That doesn’t happen very often, but it was the only way I knew to express what I was feeling.  The post below is what I wrote.  Her Pastor, Pastor Hakes, read it for me at Grandma’s service on the Saturday of Thanksgiving weekend.  He read it JUST the way I would have, but there was absolutely NO WAY I would have been able to make it through reading it myself.  

I had a couple of relatives and friends who asked for a copy.  This was the easiest way for me to make it available, so here goes:

Tonight I got the call that I have been most dreading.  I knew before I even talked to my Dad that whatever I was about to hear was not going to be what most considered to be good news.  I could tell just by the sound of his voice in the voicemail.  It sounded exactly like my Grandpa on the very rare occasion that he called.  If Grandpa was on the other end of the line when it rang, it automatically meant the news was not happy, but you could always tell in the tone of his greeting.  My sweet Daddy had that exact same tone.  He had just gotten a call telling him that if he wanted to see Grandma when she might still recognize him and be able to communicate, he needed to make his way to her quickly.  

 

I cannot even begin to adequately express what this dear woman, who I have adored all of my life, means to me. She has taught me so much.  In large part, I am who I am because of her example.  I cannot imagine life without her, and yet I knew it was coming.  The last time I called to talk to her a couple of months ago, I KNEW that I was hearing her voice over the phone lines for the last time.  I savored every moment of that call, as difficult as it was.  It was much shorter than most of our calls, because it was so difficult for her.  I was very deliberate about my goodbye and told her in great detail how very much I love her.  

 

Who was she?  What did she teach me over the 45 years that I spent with her?  

 

She taught me to love, in so many, many ways!

 

She taught me that family is family, always and forever, no matter what and that just BECAUSE someone was family, they were special.  They came first.  If you had to make a choice, the choice was always family.

 

She taught me that a good, homemade ANYTHING would make a hard situation better.  I truly believe that her love language was “Acts of Service”.  You knew you were loved by Ruby Holtz when you sat down to one of her meals made lovingly from scratch.  As long as she lived on the farm with Grandpa, she literally spent most of her waking hours either making or planning what to make for the next meal.

 

She adored my Grandpa.  He was her very world.  It was rare to see one without the other.  Some of my most precious memories of them together are of the way that they took care of one another.  For many years, it really looked to me like there was no way that Grandpa could have survived without her.  Then she was diagnosed with cancer, had her stroke and broke her hip and we all learned just how very capable he was.  They had their “roles” and they took them seriously, without complaint. I can’t help but think how very different our country would be if there were more couples like them!

 

Her sense of love and commitment went so far that she nursed BOTH of my great-grandmothers AND my grandpa in her home leading up to their dying days.  She was not about to send them off to a hospital.  She wanted them to know that they were loved until they crossed to Heaven and were in Jesus’ care!

 

She taught me how to laugh!  Her sense of humor was such fun!  I still remember the summer day when Grandma Holtz was the mastermind behind a prank trapping my Grandma Noble in the outhouse!  We laughed until we cried many times about that one!

 

She taught me that I and only I am responsible for “my stuff”.  My grandparents lived well below what most would consider poverty level for years, and yet they made it work.  They did what they had to do.  They grew their own food and sold it when they had to and yet they were always giving.  

 

She taught me to work and work hard.  In her opinion, no one else was responsible for doing her work for her and it was very humbling to her on the very rare occasion when she needed someone else’s help.

 

She taught me how to relax and soak up time with others.  I learned the importance of time and sitting and listening to others from her.  Regardless of what other “busyness” she had going on, she made time for others if they needed her.  There was nothing like sitting on or by the swing on the hill overlooking the countryside on a summer evening and just talking at the end of a long, often swelteringly hot, summer day.

 

She protected us and took care of us many summers while my mom and dad were at conferences.  And she did it WELL!  She pampered us as only a grandma can, but she didn’t take any guff either!  We knew not to cross all 4 foot 10 inches of her, but we also knew she had a reason for everything she did.  (That doesn’t mean we didn’t question some things, like the afternoon we snuck under the kitchen window to see WHY we had to go outside to play every time one of her frequent visitors came over.  We learned some new words from the friend’s colorful language that day, but not because grandma didn’t TRY to protect us from it!)

 

She was loyal.  She had many lifelong friends and was a member of the same church all of her adult life.  Over the last several years, any time I talked to her she used the last time she was able to go to church as her reference point.  She HATED that she was unable to attend over the last couple of years.  Her friends loved her!  The staff at the nursing home often made comment when I would get to visit her about how many friends and visitors she had.  It was not at all uncommon when I called -for her to either have a visitor in the room or have just had someone leave.

 

She taught me to serve.  For years, there wasn’t a church function where the kitchen in this very church wasn’t organized and overseen by her.  I fondly remember listening to her on the phone planning meals or ordering flowers for people at the church who were sick or had lost a loved one.  

 

She was so humble.  I don’t believe she ever truly understood how respected and loved she and Grandpa were.  This was proven to me most poignantly the night of Grandpa’s viewing.  I was standing next to her in the receiving line.  At one point, I leaned over to check with her about whether or not she needed to take a break.  She admitted that she did, but said, “I’ll just wait until there is a break in the line.”  I went to see when that break might be for her and had to compose myself before going back into the room when I realized that the line wrapped through the building and outside a full hour into the visitation time.  There was literally a line waiting to get to express their condolences to her and the rest of our family for about half an hour longer than the scheduled time.  Friends and family came from several states away to express their deep love.  People loved them both.  They couldn’t help but love them.  They WERE love!

 

Most of all, she taught me the importance her faith.  She taught me in Sunday School and took me with her for church events.  It was just understood in her home that if there was a service, we were going!  It wasn’t an option.  We were there.  I helped her in the church kitchen many times and went to Women’s Missionary Meetings and activities often when we visited.  But she taught me most just by quietly living out her faith.  She was a woman of her word.  

Not once, did I ever have reason to doubt her love for me.  She loved with all of her being…every fiber of her body.  The example of that alone is more than many people get to watch and I don’t take that for granted, not for even one fraction of a second.  

As of the time of this writing, she is not even gone yet, and I can already begin to feel the void.  But I find myself praying for her release.  She is ready to see her Savior and many times lately has told me how ready she is to see Jesus and that she misses Grandpa.  The move to the nursing home was probably one of the hardest things she ever had to do and I know she is ready to be among the throngs worshipping at Jesus’ feet.  It makes Heaven sweeter for me as well.  I will miss her terribly, but I look forward to being with her in Heaven  – to spend eternity together singing and worshipping the One who gives us both hope.  

Without even knowing it, and just by living a life well, she has given us all more than anyone else possibly could – all because of the life that she chose to live.  I will forever be grateful to be her only Granddaughter.  She is Ruby Holtz and there is not another person on this planet just like her!  I am, of all people, most blessed to call her “Grandma”!

Kudzu – Who Knew?

Ok, so it has been FOREVER since I took the time to write a blog post. Crazy busy doesn’t really even begin to describe 2013. But it’s been a good kind of busy.

Between 4 pm on Thursday and 6 pm on Friday I made three trips to the general Lawrenceburg area. For those unfamiliar with the middle TN area, that trip is at least an hour one way and I made three of them in just over 24 hours. I love driving through that area. It is Amish country in TN and the scenery is just gorgeous: rolling hills, beautiful foliage, and I love seeing the simple farms and the horse-drawn buggies and wagons. So pretty and simple!

On trip three on Friday, I noticed something. There was a huge area of Kudzu-covered scenery that was so very pretty that it caught my eye. Then it got me thinking.

I have heard different things about kudzu during my 17 years in the South. For those not familiar, it is a beautiful green cover that grows over literally everything! It is really so pretty!! Bright green blankets everything that it covers. A close friend had shared a few details about the plant with me several years ago and the little that I knew prompted me to Google “kudzu” when I got home on Friday night.

The plant originated in Japan and was brought to the US as a decorative plant for an exhibition in Philadelphia to celebrate the 100th anniversary of the US. For years, a lot of work was put into growing the plant and expanding the area where it grew. And then a problem developed. It started to take over the countryside.

Kudzu is said to grow as much as two feet per day. It can take up to ten years to kill it off once it starts to grow in an area. The green leaves are so pretty and when it flowers it is so aromatic. Why would one want to kill it off? The answer to that question is simple.

It kills off everything in it’s path.

The plant grows so fast and thick and lush that it cuts off ALL sun from being able to shine through the cover that it makes, killing everything. It grows in fields, up and over trees, signs, buildings, and can completely cover all of those things plus cars, roadways, just about everything.

What looks and smells so beautiful suddenly becomes a huge problem, stumping even the most educated horticulturalists.

Which got me thinking…

It’s a lot like sin in our lives. What starts out looking so attractive and appealing and beautiful in our eyes suddenly turns ugly. What seemed so innocent takes over every corner of our lives. It blocks out the good things and turns our entire world dark. The parts of our lives and hearts and relationships that were once strong and healthy are overtaken by what once seemed so incredibly beautiful. It happens fast and becomes so hard to turn back. Things spiral out of control and our lives and the world we live in become almost unrecognizable.

All because we willingly allowed a little sprig of something that we wanted into our lives. We watered it and fertilized it and did everything we knew to do to make it grow, or maybe we just accepted a “sprig” from someone else, enjoyed it for a few days and then ignored it, but it grew anyway, and now we don’t know how to make it stop.

But God does. That doesn’t mean it will be easy. Tearing up roots never is. The deeper the roots go and the longer they have had to do so, the harder it is to get rid of all of them.

It’s worth it though. Once the predatory plants are gone, there are so many other beautiful flowers and plants that can grow, and the variety brings such joy!

It’s the same with the sins that we allow into our lives that grow and take over. Cleaning up is always hard. We often need help in order to get things REALLY cleaned up. Sometimes it takes a long time. Sometimes you think you have it all cleared and a random shoot pops up again. But the effort is always worth it, and the Master Gardener is ALWAYS willing to help. Who could possibly be a better helper than our very Creator Who knows every weakness we have and how best to counteract them?

I am so very thankful that He cares and He WANTS to help and He has promised to always be there when we call to help us clean up our messes. So very thankful!

Because only God can take the messes of our lives and make them into a message. He has done it for me. Has He done it for you?

A Lesson from a Scab

I try to be consistent about blogging…I really do!  But life happens and BOY has life been happening lately! To say that I’ve been busy would be the understatement of the year!

BUT…I learned a lesson today that I want to make sure I have to refer back to, so blogging about it gives me an opportunity to have something to refer back to.

I’ve had a situation in my life over about the past year that sometimes feels like there’s a scab on my life that keeps getting pulled off.  Like as in STILL on about a weekly basis.  Just when I think maybe I can be done with it and it has completely healed over and I won’t have to “mess” with it anymore, something comes up that feels like the scab is just being ripped off one more time, and the hurt is revealed fresh and new, as if it just happened.

It happened again late this week more than once (isn’t THAT fun?) and I was praying about it this morning in a time of quiet while I was getting ready for the day and I was really kind of whining.  I asked God WHY this couldn’t just die and why I had to continue to deal with not only my hurt, but watching others around me hurt their way through the healing of this situation.

It was still just lurking at the back of my mind when I went to church this morning and when we were encouraged into a special time of prayers of thanksgiving and praise by my wise pastor, PT.  As I prepared myself to pray, it was as if the Holy Spirit whispered to me, “There is PURPOSE in the scab.  I know what I’m doing.  TRUST ME.”

It was then that I came to realization that one of three things is going on, and to be honest, it may very well be ALL OF THEM:  Either there are still things for me to learn from the circumstances of this particular situation OR My Father, who knows ALL THINGS, knows that I need the reminders in order to be sensitive to what He has already taught me OR He wants me to remain sensitive to the hurt for others who are still walking through it also.

I also came to this realization:  When we have injuries or wounds that scab over, sometimes they heal over and there is never another indication of them, but at other times there is a scar that is left.  That scar is a constant reminder of the circumstances surrounding the injury.  The wound stops hurting, but the INDICATION of it is still there.

I truly think that this is one of THOSE situations.  Throughout life, for everyone involved, there will be reminders.  How we choose to look at those reminders is up to us.

I have a choice to make, not just today, but on a daily basis.  I choose joy!  I choose healing!  I choose forgiveness!  I choose to let myself be “used”.

I choose to realize the “Beauty in the Scars”, as stated in the lyric to this song (click on the title), written by my sweet “Gentle Giant” of a nephew, Caleb.

What about you?  I would love to hear your thoughts.  Would you comment below to tell me how God has taught YOU these things?

 

Newtown, CT and Nashville, TN

I’ve not had a lot of “online” time recently, but I HAVE had quite a bit of time to think!  During one of those “thinking sessions”, my mind was drawn back to one of my very first blog posts from August of 2011.  We all like to be right, don’t we?  This is one of the times that it is NOT a pleasure to be right.  The events in Newtown, CT in December made the scenario that was brought to my mind several years ago all too real.  It broke the hearts of our nation, just as I thought it would.  But do we really “get” what happened and the correlation that it has in cities all across the USA?  Scenarios like the one I referred to in that post in August of 2011:

“One of the purposes of a personal blog is to allow people to get to know the blog owner/writer better.  If you’re going to follow my blog, you will quickly find out that one of my passions is for babies and their mothers and other family members involved in what are often called “crisis pregnancies“.  Most often these are “unexpected” babies.  There is MUCH I could say about those terms, but that is not the purpose of my post today.  Instead, I would like to take this opportunity to share with you one of the many reason that I have the passion and take the stand that I do.

I realize that not all of my family and friends and readers of this blog agree with my stand, but I DO ask that you take the time to read my thoughts.  This was originally a note that I posted on Facebook a couple of years ago after a significant piece of legislation passed that my friends at TN Right to Life had been fighting for over a period of several years.  I think the rest is self-explanatory:

Today should have been a day of great rejoicing for me.  I, along with my dedicated Pro-Life friends in the state of Tennessee, had much to celebrate today as we saw significant legislation passed that we have worked diligently for over the past several years.  But instead of truly being able to celebrate this victory, my heart is heavy.

It is heavy because of a text that I received from a friend this afternoon.    That text broke what, under different circumstances, would have been a HUGE news story that would have been heard all over the United States.  But that news story will never be heard.  It won’t be heard because it told a story that could be repeated DAILY in cities across this country.  My friend was standing outside of an abortion “clinic” praying for 28 women who went into the clinic this morning, all of them apparently with the intent of aborting their babies today.

What if the story was changed just slightly?  What if a couple of years had passed, all of those women had carried their babies to term and those sweet children were all playing together in a daycare facility that was attacked?  THAT news headline would be splashed across the headlines of news reports all across our country tomorrow morning.  What if, while in that facility this morning, it had been attacked and one or more of those inside had been injured or harmed?  THAT headline would also be heard all across this country.

But instead, because abortion is still legal in this country, most, if not all of those 28 babies were brutally murdered today and not one news outlet will ever hear about it.  There is an entire classroom full of future kindergartners that will never go to their first day of school.  There are 28 women who will deal with the after-effects of their choice today in spite of the lies that they have been told that there are none.

I have not had personal experience with abortion.  But I DID watch a friend wrestle with what some call that “option” during our Senior year of High School.  I HAVE experienced the sorrow of many women who, years later, are still trying to forget “that day”.   I have stood at many informational booths for Pro-Life organizations with fetal models and photographs.  Not the graphic ones that so often are portrayed when you think of “Pro-Life People”, but simple informational brochures and life-like models that portray the various stages of development during pregnancy.  Even the smallest of children, when they see the “models”, want to see and hold the “babies”.

I recently had the heart-wrenching experience of watching and then standing alongside of a woman at one of these booths while she came to grips with the decision she had made years before.  She wept bitterly as she came to the realization of what she had done while she cried, “I’m so sorry.  I didn’t know!”  You can’t tell ME that abortion is a decision that does not have after-effects.  I’ve seen them.  They’re ugly.  Many of them are permanent, such as infertility caused by abortion, breast cancer, guilt and other emotional and physical problems.

This is why I grieve.  And this is why my commitment to doing everything that I personally can to stop the tragedy of abortion is strong.”

A lot has changed in my life, my priorities and in my relationships over the last year, but one thing that has NOT changed is my passion for the unborn and the families that are impacted in crisis pregnancy situations.  You see, just as we saw in Newtown last month, EVERY LIFE, no matter how young, has meaning and purpose and impact.

Will you join me or will you do nothing while days like the one described above are repeated?  Are you interested in learning what you can actively do to get involved in your community?  Please comment below or send me a message via the contact page or on Facebook and I will GLADLY help you join the fight!  

I’ll have more thoughts on the CT tragedy as soon as I have time to sit down and express them, but for now, I hope you’ll truly take some time to determine how you can be used to make an impact in the cause of life!  January is Sanctity of Human Life month and this year marks the 40th Anniversary of the Roe vs. Wade Decision.  My prayer is that we don’t commemorate 41 years of that law being in effect, but that will take a miracle and a lot of passionate people working hard.  JOIN ME?

What Could Possibly Be Bad About Being a QUEEN? (Subtitle: Sticking Your Neck Out When It’s NOT Easy!)

I know, I know, long time no post.  

Life has happened.  You know, the kind of life where you’re so busy some days that you actually consider not going to bed in hopes of actually crossing HALF of your list off for the day?  THAT kind of busy.  

But I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about a Queen.  We often think that Royalty “has it made”.  They live the easy life and have people waiting on them hand and foot.  They have “people” for every area of life.  I’m sure there are drawbacks for every “nicety” that they experience, but this particular queen had some special challenges.

For starters, she was an orphan.  Then she was under the watch-care of an uncle who “strongly encouraged” her into a beauty contest.  But this wasn’t just any old beauty contest.  THIS contest was to REPLACE a queen that got de-queened, if that’s a word, for not doing what her king wanted her to.

So he had a contest. But it wasn’t just any old contest.  THIS one was intense!  She had a full YEAR of preparation, with very specific rules of purification that she had to complete and she had servants assigned to her to make sure that things went as planned.  Her uncle watched out after her the whole time, sending messages as he could to make sure she was OK.  

At the end of the contest, the King found favor with her and made her his new Queen.  But then came the complications.  The Queen’s uncle discovered a plot to kill the King, sent a message to the Queen, and as a result saved the King’s life.

About this same time, the King appointed a new “Right Hand Man” in the kingdom who had  authority over others in the kingdom.  This authority kind of went to his head, and when he started to notice that most of the men were bowing to him but the Queen’s uncle wouldn’t he got mad and decided to go to the King to make a new rule.  This rule REQUIRED people to pay homage and bow before the RHM.  

But the Queen’s uncle’s people were not technically under the authority of the RHM and the rule then didn’t apply to them.  But that didn’t make the RHM happy.  In fact, it really “cheesed his toast”!  So, RHM went to the King and pointed out that these people “were trouble-makers” and asked permission to have ALL of these people killed, and their possessions seized and then the RHM was made the decision-maker over what to do with both them and their “stuff”.

This sent The Queen’s uncle into quite a state and he was found to be sitting by the gate of the palace, his garments torn and dirty, and reports started coming into The Queen about his behavior.  So The Queen sent one of her “people” out to the gate to find out what was going on and what had her uncle so upset.  

The Queen’s helper came back to her with a copy of the edict AND a message from her uncle.  He wanted HER to go before the King to plead for her people.  Now, you’re thinking, “That shouldn’t have been a big deal, right?  He was the King.  She was the Queen.”  But here’s where it gets sticky:  The Queen KNEW the rules.  The rules said that anyone who went before The King without being invited LITERALLY TOOK THEIR LIFE INTO THEIR OWN HANDS.  Now, if you’ll remember, The Queen hadn’t been INVITED to appear before The King.

Scary????  Ummm….scarier than scary!  This was truly a life or death request.  The Queen sent a message back to her uncle reminding him of this little fact.

But he replied back and said, “Look, I understand that, but if you stay quiet, somebody else is going to have to fight the battle, but YOUR family will perish.  Do you think maybe THIS is why you are where you are?”

So The Queen asks her uncle to gather her people and ask them to fast and pray for her and she makes a plan.  She plans a special dinner for the King.  She went before The King and she was so beautiful that The King indicated that it was OK for her to be there and could tell that she was upset.  He asked her what was wrong.  Rather than telling him right then, she invited him to her dinner party.  

But she was a SMART woman, so she also invited the RHM to come with the King.  She fed them a wonderful meal and filled their tummies, then she made her request.  But she STILL didn’t get right to it.  She invited them to come AGAIN for dinner.  Both of them.

And the RHM went home and gloated to his family about how favored he was and that even The Queen invited JUST The King and his RHM to a banquet.  But he also told them that it STILL made him angry that The Queen’s uncle wouldn’t bow to him.

So the RHM’s wife suggested that he have all of the necessary instruments built to hang The Queen’s uncle and then AT the banquet, request that the King allow him to hang The Queen’s uncle.  Haman LOVED this idea and jumped right on it!

But during the night, The King couldn’t sleep, so he called for one of his servants to come read to him.  His “bedtime story” was a recounting of the story of when The Queen’s uncle saved The King’s life.

The King got to thinking and wondered if the man who saved his life had been adequately thanked and was informed that he hadn’t been!

And then The King heard a noise.  When he asked what was going on, it was the RHM, who chose that very time to come in and ask about having The Queen’s uncle killed.  Rather than finding out FIRST what the RHM wanted, the King asked him what HE would suggest that The King do to honor someone.  In all of the RHM’s arrogance, he thought HE was the one to be honored, so he made GRANDIOSE suggestions:  Royal robes, one of The King’s horses and an escort and then he was to be led through the city streets proclaiming that he was being honored by The King.

Well, how surprised to you think the RHM WAS when he was told that HE was to take the robe and horse and lead THE QUEEN’S UNCLE, the man HE wanted to KILL, around on the horse through the city.  

The RHM went home, ashamed, and told his wife all that had happened. She was in the process of reminding him that there was NO WAY he was going to be allowed to kill him, but would likely end up having to fall before HIM in honor!  While they were still talking, The King’s men came to get him for The Queen’s Banquet.

While sitting WITH The King and The Queen, the RHM had to listen as The Queen begged The King to save both HER life and the life of her people.  She reported that she and her people had been sold and were to be killed and annihilated. 

The King was SHOCKED!  He did not know that The Queen was from the people that he had given permission to have killed.  So, in his shock, he asked her how this was possible and who was responsible.  While the RHM sat before them, The Queen ratted him out!  She pointed to him and said, “It’s HIM!  He is responsible.”

The King was so angry that he stormed out of the room, but the RHM stayed behind to BEG The Queen to spare his life.  The King came back in to find his RHM sprawled out on one of the couches, apparently in a pose that looked compromising, and assumed that he had assaulted The Queen, adding insult to injury.  

One of The King’s servants chose that moment to point out the instruments of death that the RHM had constructed to kill The Queen’s Uncle, and before Haman knew what was going on, he was hanged on the very gallows he built.

And King Ahasuerus’ anger subsided.  And Mordecai, the Uncle was saved, along with ALL of the nation of Israel.  And Queen Esther was responsible. (Read the Book of Esther to hear the whole story – this is my translation!)

All because she was WILLING to take “a risk” and do what she was asked to do.

This was a Jewish woman following the prompting of her Uncle, but what about us today?

God asks us to take a stand in SO MANY situations.  Very seldom today is our VERY LIFE in jeopardy for following His leading.  It may be hard, yes.  It may SEEM like it is sucking the very life out of us.  We may risk our reputation or our position or our name, in some circles.  But we are not asked to give our life.  

He simply wants us to take the stand that he asks us to take.  And to be bold and sometimes to be brave.  

Sometimes we are the ONLY one willing to do it.  

But what if we are the ONLY ONE THAT HE NEEDS to get the job done?

And what if we choose not to, because of what “might” happen?

Puts a different spin on “hard things”, doesn’t it?  

Do you have a story of how you have found this to be true?  I would love to hear it, and I know there are others reading this who would too!  Please Comment Below and share your thoughts.  I sincerely want to hear them!  And I PROMISE you, I know of situations RIGHT NOW where people NEED to hear them.  THANK YOU in advance!  

BE AN ESTHER!  You have NO IDEA what a difference you might make!

I Don’t Understand…

There is so much about life that I just don’t understand…

Why don’t people keep their word?  Do they LIKE not being considered trustworthy?

Why do some expect 100% of others, but don’t give 100% themselves?

Wouldn’t it be easier to live a life of integrity than to have to worry about being “found out”?

Why doesn’t everyone like Christmas music all year ’round?

How is it possible to be “pro-life” and treat those who are already here as if they don’t matter?

How can anyone truly be “jobless”?  Find SOMETHING to do!  Or SEVERAL somethings!!!

Why do you trust God with your eternity, but not your relationships or your daily life?

Why do people pay full price for anything?

Is it worth losing your reputation for integrity to keep from having to do something “hard”?

Why did I not hear about “Duck Dynasty” until the END of the first season???

How can someone sit under the teaching of Tom McCoy for years and not know that their political ideas don’t line up?

Why did God choose to bless ME by being the aunt of three of the most talented kids I know?

What has happened to “common sense” and “common courtesy”?

Why is it illegal in the state of TN to kill a snake?????

Isn’t it easier to do right than to worry about people finding out that you’re not?

Why did Jesus love me enough to die for me?

I don’t understand…but I’m glad I have a Father who does!

The “Reality Show” That Is My Life!

One of the things that I remember the most about my Grandma Noble, my mom’s mom, is her laugh.  I’ve been told by aunts, uncles and cousins who were all older than me that I never really knew the “Real” Grandma Noble.  We didn’t know it until after she passed away, but she was diagnosed as having Alzheimer’s as a result of the autopsy done after she died (very early in the time that they started diagnosing it!)  All that to say, the fact that I remember her laugh the most is significant.  By outward appearances, she didn’t seem to have a lot to laugh about.  She died right before I turned 15 and was sickly and ailing most of the years that I can remember before that.

I guess watching her and the memory of hearing her laugh has really had an impact on me.  It is one of the things that has impressed upon me the need to look for the good in life.  Often we have to make the choice to let a situation get us down or to find what there is to laugh about.

Today was one of those days!  And boy did I have plenty to laugh about when I saw the mental images of my morning!

I overslept and hurried into the office just in time to not be “late”.  I have a window of time that I’m supposed to be in my place at the church office on Monday and Tuesday and I breathed a sigh of relief as I pulled into the parking spot with just a moment to spare.  I jumped out of the car to scoot into the office and shut the door…or I should say I TRIED to shut the door.  I’ve been driving my Blazer this week because the car of my parent’s that they have loaned to me is having “issues”.  I was in an accident several years ago and the front driver’s side door was t-boned and bent so badly that the body shop had to replace it.  It has never really worked 100% correctly since then, but in the last few months it has gotten really bad.

As in, one night while the kids were driving it, they got out at the ball field and it fell off.  FELL OFF!

(Side note:  If you pray for me, would you please ask God to provide a new-to-me vehicle that is reliable and will get decent gas mileage so that I can return my parent’s car and have my transportation needs covered at a cost that is affordable to me?)

It also apparently has had an issue that I was unaware of where it just won’t latch shut, which was what happened today.  I tried to figure out what the problem was several times, ALL THE TIME thanking the Good Lord that it happened TODAY and not yesterday when I already looked like a drowned rat anyway because of the torrential rain.  (No umbrella – it was in the car I USUALLY drive…  😉

Then I gave up and went in search of a mechanical-type person (translated:  just about anyone.  I have little or no natural ability in that area!)  My Knight-in-shining-armor at 8:30 AM was Pastor Eric.  He came out, looked at it for just a moment and had it shut, then he took a second to show me what to do if it happened again.  EASY!   I could do that.

EXCEPT that I didn’t have all of the info.  It worked THAT time, but when I left the office to go print off docs for a loan closing and head out for the closing, it decided not to work again.  Only problem THIS time was that the “easy fix” didn’t work.  And all of the “mechanical type people” (translation:  men, in this instance) were in a staff meeting.

I was on a time crunch, and I knew that there was help at home, so I hopped in the car and decided that I thought I could hold it shut long enough to get home. Let’s just say that my friends in the Thompson Station/Spring Hill area missed a good opportunity for a laugh at my expense today!  My Knight-in-shining-armor at 11:45 AM was my brother Doug, assisted by Ashlynne (my niece) who, unbeknownst to me, had experience with this particular problem in this particular vehicle.

Several of my friends and family members have said for years that I need to journal all of the craziness that happens in my world – one of the reasons I started blogging – and more recently have joked that I REALLY need to have a reality TV show, because often video footage would undoubtedly be priceless in some of the situations where I find myself.

All that to say, the “adventure of the day” wasn’t over.  If there had been a camera following me today, they would have also seen me drive out to the beautiful Santa Fe (that’s pronounced “FEE” for those of you who aren’t in Middle TN) area to do a closing (about 40 minutes on super curvy roads each way), only to realize that I PROBABLY should have gotten gas before I left.  (I made it, but on fumes!)

And top that off with the fact that, out of fear of not being able to get the door shut again on my own out in the middle of “nowhere”, every time I got in or out of the car, I climbed over the center console and in and out of the passenger-side door – a sight to see I have no doubt!

So, if you happened to be one of the poor souls that saw me bottoms up, getting in or out of the car at the gas station or Kroger or the church, I APOLOGIZE!

Guess one of the next episodes of “If I Were A Weaker Woman I Would Just Give UP” (the title I would choose for a reality show) will probably be, “Carol goes to the auto mechanic for the FOURTH time in less than a week to see if she can get the door fixed…”

Would you watch????

Some days it’s a CHOICE to laugh, so you don’t cry!

“I Never Lost My Praise”

Music speaks to me in ways that nothing else does.  It always has.

There has been a lot going on in my world over the last several weeks, but then if you have been reading my blog, you’ve probably figured that out due to my 6 week absence…

More on that later.  A whole lot of good stuff has been going on.  God keeps pouring on blessings in ways that I really could have never imagined and I am being reminded over and over that with obedience, even during hard times, comes blessing.  God has been good to me, not just in times where I have been allowed to experience blessing, but also in some really tough times.  Life has both.  I am so very grateful to be aware of that.

This is a short post.  It’s midnight on the evening before my first Sunday officially “on staff” at my home church and I have responsibilities in the morning that dictate that I SHOULD be in bed already, but I don’t want one more evening to go by before I take an opportunity to show some gratitude.

My Jesus loves me.  He is ALWAYS with me.  He has promised that and has proven Himself faithful time and time again.

This is one of my favorite songs.  It’s an older one, but it expresses my feelings this evening perfectly.  I could not possibly express things better myself, so please take a moment to listen (and watch!).

I Never Lost My Praise (CLICK HERE!)

Not My Own

 

Something has become very clear to me lately that I really haven’t given much thought to before.  I really haven’t given enough thought in the past to the influence that I have in the lives of others.

A number of things have happened recently to remind me that there are many more people who pay attention to what I do than I ever realized.

Most recently, over this weekend I have been making a very difficult decision about a job offer.  It is difficult, in large part, because I realize that taking it (or not) makes a difference in not only my life, but in the lives of my potential employer, his family and other employees, and others.  I won’t go into all of the details, but this is just one example of how I have come to the very real conclusion that I have more responsibility to others than I often want to acknowledge.

The Lord brought a passage to my mind this morning.  The passage is specifically speaking to sexual issues, but I believe that the principles also apply here.

I Cor. 6:19-20

Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?  For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s. (NKJV)

or as stated in The Message:

Or didn’t you realize that your body is a sacred place, the place of the Holy Spirit? Don’t you see that you can’t live however you please, squandering what God paid such a high price for? The physical part of you is not some piece of property belonging to the spiritual part of you. God owns the whole works. So let people see God in and through your body.

I am not my own.  As much as I want to think that I am, even as a single person with no children, the influence that I have on the families, adults and children that I know is important.  Nothing that I do should be taken lightly.  I am realizing that I need to act as if one of the children that I know and love is looking over my shoulder at all times, because in many ways they are and can in society today!

In this day of “social media”, we all must take more responsibility than ever for our actions because we NEVER know who is watching.  NEVER.  I have truly been shocked recently at the number of people who make comment that they “saw something” that I was up to or said, etc.  I am also reminded that for every one who says something there are many others who don’t and won’t.   They just watch silently and make whatever conclusions they want, many without me ever knowing.   It’s a sobering but GREAT reminder that in a world of “social media”, we really don’t even have much control over what others are posting or including us in.  I must take more responsibility than ever for myself and where I am and who I’m with, etc.

More importantly, as someone who is a Christian, God is ALWAYS with me and He is doing more than “looking over my shoulder”, He sees my very thoughts as well as my actions.  That is some HEAVY stuff!

I was also reminded during our worship time this morning in Church that our natural tendencies are NOT to run to Jesus.  My heart is “prone to wander” and “prone to leave the God I love”, as stated in the lyrics of a wonderful old hymn, “Come Thou Fount”. CLICK HERE to listen.

My very nature is to wander from and leave the God I love.  I bear great responsibility to acknowledge that tendency in my life and fight against it, with His help and with all of my efforts.

In the end, when I stand before My Heavenly Father some day, I will have responsibility for only one person – MYSELF!  I don’t want to stand before Him in shame, wishing I had conducted myself differently.  I want to stand before Him and  hear “Well done”!

What about you?  Where have you gotten “lazy” or let your guard down?  THOSE are the places Satan will jump into and take advantage of and grow in your life.  DON’T LET HIM!  STAND FIRM!  Set your mind to it and ask both your Heavenly Father and friends and family, if needed, for help and accountability.  We are not made to “do life” alone.  Take responsibility for your choices and be the very best YOU that you can be!  You never know who is watching or what is truly at stake!